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Breaking Free

"Leaving the rat race is easy. All you have to do is quit your job, sell your house and go and live in a tent in the middle of nowhere. It's staying out of the rat race that's tricky"   Fennel Hudson

Well said Fennel Hudson and so true, well not the part about living in a tent in the middle of nowhere, I never had to do that nor wanted to do that (despite my love for backpacking and the outdoors)😀 I left the rat race many years ago but every so often, perhaps every few years, it seems I get pulled back in again. Little by little until, I realize what's happening. I can happily report that I have never been back on the treadmill since 2010 but breaking free hasn't been easy that's for sure, it's definitely been tricky.


                              Photo Courtesy Pexels.com: @magda_ehlers_photography

Every week as I talk to clients, I am reminded how fortunate I truly am to have been able to do it. It cost me for sure but I did it. The pain and suffering that getting off the treadmill of the rat race cost me was well worth it to me, my significant other however may disagree. Different strokes for different folks. Some of my clients express feeling "purposeless", "directionless" and "making good money but not happy" among other such sentiments to express what being on the treadmill of the rat race feels like to them. My heart truly goes out to them and I make a personal resolution within my heart and mind to do everything I can to help them recognize and leave the rat race if they so intend to do but to do it in a gradual, focused way, hopefully NOT the way I did it. My leaving the rat race came when I hit mental and physical exhaustion.  I was working in the mental health department of a medical clinic that served the underserved/uninsured populations and the administration of this department seemed to think that running their therapists to the ground by assigning 8 patients with moderate to significant mental health issues on a daily basis, five times a week, was a smart thing to do. The turn over rate was incredible and I have yet to understand why they continued to do this for years. If I had been young and single I might have survived that routine for another year at most. However, I was physically depleted from helping to be my mother's caretaker as she navigated through what would be the last year of her life. I was also mentally exhausted from the parenting of 3 very traumatized children (my adopted kiddos who joined our family in 2006). I remember being on my lunch break one day in 2010 and thinking "If I don't quit, I am going to run away or go crazy".  Running away or going crazy were not viable options, I was a mother to 4 children. And so I quit the rat race and have never looked back.....or so I think. Actually, in all honesty, I have looked back. I have occasionally felt regret for losing our home, seeing my kids grow up without childhood friends, losing my family and trusted friends' money (we borrowed for our business) and losing what in essence was the "American Dream" for us at the time, complete with the RV parked on a beautiful half acre property. Just writing this fills me with a bit of regret, remorse and shame. But I do not stay there long, as I have often written before that is the trick ...do not wallow too long in our negative thinking. I redirect my focus back to all that has happened in my life since then that would not have been possible had I continued on the treadmill of the rat race. My heart fills with joyful expectancy as I ponder what is yet to happen, this is the feeling  and guidance I hope to support in my clients who express sentiments of discontent, unease, and dissatisfaction with their jobs and/or life. 
I know some people will never be able to do so, even though their heart and soul yearns for it. But I also know that some will, they just need help recognizing that they are in the rat race, identifying what is truly important to them and honoring themselves (their inner yearnings) above all else (this is the hardest part). 
Don't get me wrong the trappings of the rat race are nice, I enjoy them but I hope to never ever have to repress the yearnings of my heart and soul for "outward appearances of success" and "just paying bills". Breaking free from what we have been sold is success is tricky as Fennel Hudson's quote suggest but it is possible and I highly recommend it.

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