Possibilities

"You are only scared because you can only measure what you stand to lose, you cannot see (measure) what you will gain". Kyle Cease

I love Kyle Cease's work. I learned about him a few years ago and have been a fan ever since. When I heard him say these words in an interview, it resonated big time. He was talking about the fear that most of us experience when contemplating making a big change or important decision in our lives. He states and I would agree, that most often people will not make the needed change because they cannot see the possibilities that lie in the future, we can only see and feel what we stand to lose or miss out on. Even when staying in the same place is costing us our health (both physical and mental) energy, time, relationships, etc... No surprise, we often stay in our comfort zone never really knowing what the possibilities for our life could have been for fear of making the wrong decision and losing what we already know and are comfortable with. 

Recently I have been contemplating what to do about keeping my safety net "job". It's a per diem position I used to love and has been my back-up, spending money gig for almost two years. 12 hour shifts would fly by working in the Emergency Department of a busy hospital as a social work case manager. But when COVID-19 hit, we were directed to have as little patient contact as possible (understandably) and the majority of our work was relegated to phone calls and thus sitting on my ass for 12 hours! Not a good position for someone who loves to be moving around, interacting with others in person and has lower back issues. For months now, I have been hesitant to let go of this job for fear of losing the security it gives me. However, for months now, sitting on my bum for so long has exacerbated my lower back issues. Why is it, that even when we know something is not good for us or that we have outgrown something (such as a job, career or relationship) we still hesitate to change? Kyle's quote reminds me of why....we can only measure what we will lose, we cannot measure what we stand to gain...we cannot see the possibilities that exist unless we make the change. I was reminded of Kyle's first quote because in another interview I was listening to very recently (last week) he said "...the thing you are justifying you need to keep, is the thing you need to let go of"...that one hit me straight in the gut but in a good way. I have been justifying keeping this job for months now, for fear of what? Never getting another job? Lol, my sister and friends tell me I am the Master of getting jobs, which is true....I have never, since I started working for a paycheck at age 14 been without a job. I caught how limited my thinking really has been when I heard his interview last week because I am thinking of another "job". Due to COVID putting a detour in my education/entertainment/event business all I have been focusing on lately is another job. But what if the possibilities that exist are beyond just another job? I guess I'll never know unless I am willing to let go and see...

I read the following passage many, many years ago and provides a beautiful example of the sort of possibilities that can exist beyond our fears, illusion of safety nets and comfort zones.

“Come to the edge," he said.

"We can't, we're afraid!" they responded.

"Come to the edge," he said

"We can't, We will fall!" they responded.

"Come to the edge," he said.

And so they came.

And he pushed them.

And they flew.”

― Guillaume Apollinaire 

 

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