"Your new life is going to cost you your old one." Brianna Wiest
The other day, I happened to look through one of my older journals, in fact it was the first journal I had ever started, pretty late in life, just some years back (2014). It was a journal a friend gave me as a birthday gift and I occasionally enjoy looking through it and being re-inspired by the ideas, quotes, thoughts, and reflections that are in it. When I flipped to the page where I had cut and pasted the quote above and re-read it, I felt such a deep knowing it was almost physical. It felt as if someone or something had "stabbed" my heart with the truth. It was in no way an unpleasant feeling and I wish I could find another word instead of "stabbed" but that's what it felt like. It's probably why people say "hit in the gut with the truth" or "your gut feeling". Your gut being your intuition, the part of you that knows the truth for you. Not the truth that others want or expect from you or even what you think you should want for the sake of others.
Also in my journal right below the quote above is this quote: "The person you're becoming will cost you people, relationships, spaces and material things. Don't give up on that person you're becoming, it's OK to choose your growth over everything." #Wednesday Wisdom/Project Happiness
I remember feeling a deep sense of validation when I found, read and cut and pasted this second quote into my journal back in 2014. Like many women, especially Moms, I struggled for years with the decision to choose my growth over everything else. I know that second sentence is very hard for people especially women to be OK with. It's almost like we are choosing to be selfish, when in fact it's self-care. This second quote to me is just another way of saying "If Mama ain't happy, no one's happy"
I know and feel that I am going through yet another personal transformation and that is why these quotes once again touched me so deeply. At this point in my life, I have lost count of how many personal transformations I have gone through.
In a Google search, transformation is defined as: a thorough or dramatic change in form or appearance; a metamorphosis during the life cycle of an animal.
My personal transformations are not always huge changes in outer appearance or form as I would guess most people think of when you hear "transformation" or "metamorphosis". Many of my transformations especially in the past few years, have been "inner shifts" or maybe even "inner healings".
Dr Kristin Whitelaw, Clinical Psychologist (www.kristinwhitelaw.com) writes: "Transformation happens when we are willing to see that we are more than we have come to believe we are. To be open to see things differently and to recreate our perceptions. Transformation sheds light on the illusions we have been living by and reveals what is actually real and true for us. Transformation clearly defines our authentic and natural essence as the valuable beings we are...Changes happen in all our lives, whether they are stages of growth, relationships ending and beginning, death or loss, transitions in thought or an inner shift that represents our own, personal transformation."
In last month's blog post I wrote how much I LOVE change. So then it comes as no surprise that I LOVE personal transformations. I love going through them myself and I love inspiring and helping others to navigate through their own personal growth and transformation. I will admit however, sometimes the "I love transformation" part has only come with hindsight, once I have made it through the "caterpillar soup". You know what I mean by "caterpillar soup"? That's the part of the metamorphosis process when the caterpillar probably feels like he/she is dying or would rather die before the realization of his/her beauty, uniqueness and wings (freedom). These types of transformations can and will happen to many of us. However, what I am most recently inspired by are the personal transformations that are marked by the "inner shifts" that can happen both intentionally and joyfully. That is what I am currently experiencing and let me tell you, compared to my "caterpillar soup" moments, days and months...I am loving and enjoying this process immensely.
In the weeks ahead, I am setting the dates for my 2020 workshops and look forward to once again being able to assist and inspire others to grow, expand and transform through the "caterpillar soup" way or the "inner shifts" way.
To learn more and join me in beautiful Santa Barbara, CA please visit my website below.
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